The Importance of Feeling Good

Yesterday I had a BIG experience which has created a twist in my gut all night. Someone told me that I was "tactless" and "niave" to be saying how good I felt on my social networks and blog despite the pain of others. I was shocked since this has all been my self-therapy to reach my own happy-place without any thought of what has been labelled by others as, "gloating". I am amazed. Why isn't it okay to feel good and shout it from the rooftops once you have actually managed to turn your despair into joy?

Abraham's Take on the Emotions: A GPS

Abraham is a non-physical entity channeled by Esther Hicks. She is the author of multiple best selling books on the topic of the Law of Attraction, and has been touring the country with her work for the last 20 years. Abraham, through Esther, suggests that we all have an Inner Being, a true essence of who we are, who communicates to us through emotions. Emotions are powerful magnetic attractors which are like a GPS indicating how close we are to our Inner Being - the mysterious place of alignment which connects us with the All That Is. Abraham provides us with a tangible scale to evaluate where we are using our emotional guidance system.

Emotions on this scale are neither labelled "good" or "bad", they are simply information from our inner being about how to feel good. By pinpointing where we are on this emotional scale we can take deliberate action to move upwards towards a place of health and vitality. By deliberately choosing better feeling thoughts we can consciously move up the scale from despair to joy. Her first and primary book, "Ask and It is Given", shares this philosophy in detail, along with 22 Processes which can be used to uplevel the vibrance of your thoughts. 

Just even looking at the scale has been VERY useful for me to do several times throughout the day. Sometimes I notice that I am actually much lower on the scale than I imagined, so I take deliberate action to "get happy". I do this because it feels good to me when I am happy. I am more productive, functional, uplifted, and enjoying life. When I am higher on the scale, good things happen to me more frequently, I meet just the right people at the right time, I experience more miracles, I laugh more and feel gratitude for being alive. Things I dream about for "one day" happen. Things I want to manifest appear. It is amazing. Honestly, I will do just about anything to get happy. Writing exercises, affirmations, exercise, hooping, meditation, laughter yoga, whatever. It is my life practice to master every possible way I can to feel good! 

What Does the Emotional Guidance Scale Look Like?

Here is what the emotional guidance scale looks like ~(note the numbers are just keeping this organized and easy to reference)

1. Joy/Empowerment/Freedom/Love/Appreciation

2. Passion

3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness

4. Positive Expectation

5. Optimism

6. Hopefulness

7. Contentment

8. Boredom

9. Pessimism

10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience

11. "Overwhelment"

12. Disappointment

13. Doubt

14. Worry

15. Blame

16. Discouragement

17. Anger

18. Revenge

19. Hatred/Rage

20. Jealousy

21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness

22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

One important note of this philosophy is that emotions are really not "good or bad". They are just a handy indicator one can use for reference to notice how close or far away we are allowing ourselves to be from Source. So when someone who was feeling deep despair is suddenly feeling anger, it is actually a good thing, because it means they have progressed upwards closer to joy! 

I myself have been fluctuating a lot along this scale. Many times I have been sobbing in despair, even just this last week - even yesterday! Then I suddenly had the urge to say something spiteful soon afterwards. In the past I would have judged that. Now I am trying to just acknowledge it is part of an upward climb and do breathing meditation through the urge (instead of acting on it, which I generally regret). Then I make a deliberate choice to do an exercise to move the energy to a better feeling place by choosing better feeling thoughts.

How to Change Your Emotional Set Point

Two exercises to uplevel thoughts (which can be seen in my blog and social networks) are "Rampages of Appreciation" and "Focus Wheels". I share them publicly because it feels good to broadcast when I have successfully transformed struggle into elation. Also, when I do, I generally hear from people that they are very helpful because others are often exploring ways to emotionally uplevel.

Anyways, these are super simple exercises and I will share them here. Again, more guided description is in Ask and it is Given.

Rampage of Appreciation

In a Rampage of Appreciation, you look around at your environment and notice what pleases you. You choose to focus your thoughts on one specific pleasing thing and allow your attention to become completely engaged. You look deeply and think of all the different things you appreciate and love about this thing. By writing about how pleasing and wonderful it is, you actually notice your positive feelings increasing overall. I usually write about a paragraph. I have done this simple exercise with my wood beam ceiling, my plants, the sunshine and other simple everyday things. It has been life changing. Here is an example of one of my rampages of appreciation:

On Sunshine: I love the sun! I so appreciate this massive ball of warmth and gleaming light which rises and sets every day of my life. I love the colors of the sun -- the oranges, reds and even whites. I adore the exansiveness of the sun in the sky -- it is such a glorious and predictable friend in my life. I adore her heat! She always warms me... I love the feeling of the sun on my bare skin (with sunblock!) and enjoy how she helps all the living plants grow and expand into their highest potential of fruits and blooms. I love the sunrise, when lightness and brightness arises where before, there was darkness. I love sunsets, the warmness of the colors, how the clouds can become purple and orange and all the wonderful sweetness of the change. I love watching the sun go down on the ocean, and how the water reflects the light. I love the sun's gift of inspiration, joy and hopeful courage. When I am in sunlight, I feel energized, active and ready to grow into my highest essence. Thank you! I am so grateful for the wonderful, wonderful sun!!!

I try to write at least one of these per day, among other feel good exercises. 

Focus Wheels

The other type of exercise which you can see the results of in my social networking are called Focus Wheels. A focus wheel functions on the scientific fact that once you hold a thought firmly in your mind for 17 seconds, another thought of the same quality generally appears next. We can use this to our advantage by becoming much more selective about the thoughts we have. This exercise can be used when we are actually feeling emotional difficulty and want to deliberatly change our emotional set-point to experience relief.

In a Focus Wheel, you first choose the ideal way of thinking which you want to have about whatever situation is troubling you. No matter how far away it feels in the realm of possibility, allow yourself to imagine the best feeling thought you can possibly imagine having about the situation. You begin by writing this in the center of a piece of paper, in a circle. Next, you create 12 circles surrounding this central idea at each of the 12 locations of the hours around a clock. Begin by trying to think of a thought which provides some relief from where you currently are. Here is an example

Thought trying to change: I feel fat.

Thought in center which I want to get to: I love my beautiful body!

First attempt at a thought of relief: I used to be thin. 

You notice that this thought actually causes more negativity than relief because when you think it you begin to feel bad that you are no longer thin.

Second attempt at a thought of relief: My mom is thin. 

You notice that this thought also provides no relief because now you feel inadequate next to her.

Third attempt at a thought of relief: I know I can make positive changes in my life.

You notice that this third statement actually provides a tangible feeling of relief and so you write it it your first circle at 12 O "Clock and focus on it intently for 17 seconds, noticing which thoughts come next which feel good.

You may notice a string of similar thoughts are some searching. Slowly, after identifying the best feeling thought and writing it in a circle and focusing on it for 17 seconds, you end up with a focus wheel like this:

I have made amazing changes in my body in the past so I know I am capable.

I am doing more exercise so that is a good thing.

I am choosing to eat more vegetables and I know that is benefiting me.

I don't have to change myself overnight, it is okay if this takes some time.

What's important is that I have chosen to feel good and to take at least one action a day.

It will be fun when I can buy some new clothes because I am so skinny!

I am going to feel more energized, healthy and joyous!

This is going to be a fun process. 

Maybe I'll make some new healthy friends.

I'm loving this process of being a conscious creator!

I love my body. I know we are a team and together, we can do this!

I love focus wheels! When I actually have the discipline to be able to do them, I notice my entire perspective instantaneously changes. What a gift.

The Importance of Feeling Good and Social Networks

All of this finally brings me back around to the topic of this blog: the importance of feeling good, and my gut wrench around being labelled "gloating" when posting in social networks when I have good feelings. I guess you could say that I am so completely self absorbed in my own healing process that this didn't crossed my mind! While some may think sharing joy when others are miserable is poor taste, I choose to view it as positive, indicating there are wider possibilities to consciously choose a fun life experience. 

Abraham, through Esther, shares that those who are vibrating lower on the emotional scale will positively despise those who are feeling great because the vibration of joy is so completely unrecognizable. She actually suggests refraining from conversations with those at completely different vibrational set points where you talk about how great you feel because they will (with justice) find you so completely irritating that they feel like you are driving them completely crazy. 

The interesting thing about this situation is that social networks are a one-way conversation. There is no holding back from speaking around some people who are miserable and choosing to speak only to the happy people. When you blog, Tweet, or post a Facebook one-liner, everyone in your network (in my case- all 840 in my Facebook and all 444 in my Twitter account) instantaneously view it.  I don't tailor all my entries to accommodate one specific person or community and their emotions. I tailor my entries to uplevel my own emotions.

In the end, I am sorry that this has caused confusion, anger, bewilderment and apparent agony. All I want to do is share love and be happy. We are each making our way in the best way possible. I am doing my best at choosing joy and I hope to spend time with others who want to play with me in these realms. My lesson in all of this: from now on, I will whisper my joy in lower case instead of shouting it in capital letters.  I'll turn down the volume, but I won't change the essence of who I have worked so hard to become. 

I welcome feedback on this blog entry, btw! This has been a challenging topic to write about for me for multiple reasons and I am open to hearing new ideas and growing...

Comments

[Rhonda]

Is this person trying to bring you down to her/his level of unhappiness?

Good for you and your positive attitude! Enjoy!

[scrantasia]

Someone has been busy :). Jerry and Esther would be proud of how you've represented Abraham with your words...

[Laura]

I'm really enjoying "Ask & It Is Given" since you recommended it on the UK training recently... It came at a perfect time for me.

I think when people respond to your words, they are really expressing their own frustrations, rather than being frustrated towards you personally. So when they are negative towards your positivity, it may be because they don't feel positive or happy in themselves and so they react badly to that.

An article I read recently described Twitter et al. as being "modern day self-affirmations", which I think can be taken in one of two ways - I took it to mean that people can use it to affect both themselves and those they connect with in a positive way :)

We all have to live in the real world, which can be hard, frustrating, nasty and all those things at the other end of the scale. Anyone who works to rise above that and find the joy and pure pleasure in life AND then spread that love to others has my complete admiration (that would include you :)

Your bright words spread fairy dust thoughout the www and that carries through into many offline lives too... Don't stop shining that light, just because some people like to live in the dark. I happen to appreciate and adore your positivity. It makes my day that little bit brighter and prompts me to start climbing that scale myself.

Much love and apologies for the long reply :)

[Mayra Aryam]

"Someone told me that I was "tactless" and "niave" to be saying how good I felt on my social networks and blog despite the pain of others."

I find it very inspiring that you tell the whole world how good you feel and how thankful you are for the amazing life you have, and how you welcome the "problems" you sometimes face in front of you and are able to turn them into amazing life lessons that will make you stronger and help your soul grow!

It reminds me that I,too,can feel that way about my life.

Beijos,
Mayra

[Sue]

So you have over 1000 contacts on your various social networks. I bet only a scant few complained about you being tactless etc. The other 990 will read the sunshine in your words and perhaps feel a little brighter as a result.

You shouldn't change the way you post. No one has to read your work if they don't like it. You are doing this for you, not for others. It's your space to say what you want.

There will always be people in trouble, pain and despair. We can't help them by joining them. We have to do the best we can with what we have to hand.

You have obviously had some big life issues to deal with recently and this is your way of fighting them and surviving. Better this way than to fall into a pit of grief and risk loosing all you have worked for.

Keep on keeping on Christabel. Give us something to aspire to and learn from.

Much love.
Sue

[Lisa/"Ops"]

I can only guess that those who made the "tactless" and "naive" comments have never met nor spoken with you, either IRL or online. All it takes is just a few moments with you to sense the goodness and light you radiate.

If we could all take just a few moments to get to know someone we don't necessarily vibe with -- whether a neighbor, someone out in public, wherever -- that brief connection can lead to a better understanding and even appreciation, of where they're coming from and their unique path. And what we have to learn, and even benefit, from it.

Love, love
Lisa

[Bunny Star]

You challenge so many people on so many levels Christabel it is no wonder that the rays are so bright and for some a tad glaring. I think historically we are still so used to a psychospiritual atmosphere of negativity / suffering that to reach the point that u r at is like blasting through one's own personal stratasphere of limitation AND that of the collective unconsciousness. It's no small task. Personally, I love being reminded that EVERYTHING IS POSITIVE and that that single pointed focus is an absolute truth on the path of evolution. Thank you for your generous spirit in sharing so much of your internal world and your HOT hoopdance move. You have changed my life and for that and so much more I am eternally grateful X LOVE TO YOU from transgalactic Star*Landia x0x p.s congratulations and cant wait to read your book!

[Christabel]

WOW! Your responses have really blown me away everyone. Thank you so much for taking the time to share.

I also had a very significant conversation with a friend which brought up a curious question to consider... "why does it matter to me so much what others think of me?" After all, any outsider would already think I am nuts - running a business about hula hooping, believing in lightbeings and angels, finding hummingbird sightings magical and meaningful, using crystals and elixers for vibrational healing, etc. I mean, what part of my life isn't "kooky" from outside standards??

I think a large lesson for me is to accept my uniqueness as a gift and let go of the need for outside validation. I need to believe in myself. I can only be me! Seeking approval from society is impossible when inner guidance sets the standards...

xoxo
Christabel

[Natasha]

There is pain and suffering every single day all over the world. That is the truth of the matter. That doesn't mean that you shouldn't share your joy, no matter how small or large.

Your joy may inspire someone who is having a bad day! If someone who is suffering feels miserable because you (or anyone else) is feeling happiness, that is something for them to work on, not something for you to fix.

Pain and joy are both natural parts of life. You are an open person and you share both of these with people publicly, and you should not feel pressured to censor your happiness for fear that someone out there might be offended by your happiness.

As the saying goes, don't hide your light under a bushel.

[Jennaluna]

I agree with what everyone has said here...I just kept thinking the same thought while I was reading this:

You should never dim your own light in order to make other's lights shine brighter. Shining your light brighter will help them illuminate theirs!

Don't change a thing about your posts. You have the right to post whatever the heck you want, it's your profile, not theirs. It's your life, not theirs.

I would imagine that people reacting this way are just uncomfortable that you are feeling joy and they are not, but as we both know, it is a choice...and you have the tools to help you make the choices daily to live your life out of love and not fear.

I loved your representation of Abraham-hicks...I just hope that these people read this, because it is so valuable and such a good reminder!

I adore you, Christabel....exactly as you are.

~jennaluna