Have you ever felt sexual attraction but tried to supress it? What would happen if you didn't? What if you actually allowed yourself to feel the full energy of sexual attraction as fuel for your aliveness? And... what if you told your partner the truth about all your sexual feelings for other people?
This was one of today's topics at the 5 day Conscious Loving Training by the Hendrick's Institute. One participant "admitted" he had sexual feelings for lots of women, but didn't know what to do with them. That's when Katie launched into some basics about human sexuality that we rarely learn in school.
It is healthy to have sexual feelings. Sexual feelings mean we are alive. Sexual feelings mean we have a human body! Sexual feelings are to be celebrated. Sexual feelings are good.
You cause your own sexual feelings. No one "elcits" or "triggers" feelings in you. Your body creates sensations based on it's own internal chemistry, memories and emotions. You are in charge and in control!
Your ability to feel and appreciate sexual feelings for other people is expanded by your ability to enjoy sexual feelings about yourself. By deepening self-love, self-appreciation and a general feeling of personal juiciness, you actually gain more access to life force energy. This awareness heightens your ability to share this energy with others.
Everyone feels sexual feelings and usually for people from both genders. We all feel a variety of physical sensations of arousal from when you are a baby and through old age. Supression of an awareness of this creates dysfunctional behaviors.
Having sexual feelings for someone else while you are in a relationship is not betrayal. The difference between disloyalty and being alive with sexual feelings is distinguished by acknowledhing feelings versus taking unconscious action. You can create aliveness through agreements to tell your partner the truth of what you are feeling and to hear their truth, and still share an agreement to maintain monogomy. Full disclosure creates integrity.
You can acknowledge sexual feelings by breathing deeply, moving your body to flow them throughout your nervous systerm and loving yourself for feeling sensation. Sexual feelings are an invitation to become embodied! They ask us to stay inside ourselves fully and savor sensation in new ways.
Revealing the truth to your partner about feeling sexual feelings for another can open a resevoir of creative energy to support your relationship. Yes! We often feel sexual energy for those who embody an aspect of aliveness which we yearn for. By connecting to the essence of our yearning and expressing our own aliveness in new ways, we can integrate the attaction.
My invitation to you is to feel more, love more and be honest. You can make love last by being authentic about having sensations. By being honest about feelings and having clear agreements, you can create solid foundations for conscious loving relationships...
My longing for you is that you experience profound love, incredible aliveness, and delicious depths of surrender and connection. Thanks to Katie for an inspiring day of love!